Relationships are never perfect. There will always be a certain level of compromise needed when two people come together but how do you know when enough is enough?
If you are trying to get some insight on where your relationship stands, this is a must read. Relationships do hit a wall from time-to-time, it may not be the end of things. What should be a couple's first course of action is to confront and discuss. It's only after steady effort and awareness, over a period of time with no improved state, should you think about calling it quits.
Below is a list of the top five signs to watch out for if you are starting to fear the worst in your relationship.
1. You can’t settle on the big things
Yes, it’s nice to have someone who isn’t exactly the same as you. A certain level of difference makes things interesting and keeps you learning and growing as your relationship develops. However, when you can’t agree on the big decisions in life you may have to rethink if this is the right partner for you. Subjects such as where you want to live, your stance on marriage, kids, what kind of life you see for yourself having are the life-changing decisions one should agree on. If you and your partner disagree on any of these matters, it may be time to part ways and follow your own dreams.
2. You argue about everything
Notice that you seem to be constantly annoyed with your partner? If you often somehow end up in a bad mood when you are together and if you are constantly bickering, these are definite signs that something is up and it may be time for the heave ho. Often times, the arguing will go through phases and rear its ugly head only after an unresolved fight.
When you are unable to fully resolve big issues they tend to come out as 'insignificant' arguments. If you notice this seems to be happening in your relationship with more and more frequency, you know things are heading downhill and it is time to get your head out of the sand and start looking at your relationship with some harsh truth by facing the reality.
3. You put each other down
This goes beyond the petty arguments, into what I class as dangerous territory.
If you find yourself putting your partner down or picking fights for no reason, you may be dealing with built up resentment that is coming out in very unhealthy ways.
Always ask yourself: Do I like myself when I'm with him? If the answer is no, you have a problem on your hand.
4. You hide things from each other
Trust is one of the most important factors in true intimacy and without it, a relationship cannot survive in the long run.
If you notice your partner has only recently started hiding things, it may be a result of their feeling unable to share their truth with you. If you are not in tune with him/her emotionally and mentally, the 'disconnect' can cause fear for your partner to open up and be truly honest.
On the flip side, if you are the one hiding things from your partner, be truthful to yourself and your partner and deal with the core issues rather than sweep things under the rug.
Hiding things from your partner will only lead to futile destruction of the relationship. In order to be happy, you both need to be your authentic selves and if you cannot do this together, it’s time to re-evaluate.
5. You don’t recognize yourself anymore
This is when you know you've hit bottom. If you want to live your life to the fullest you need to be authentic to who you are. If you notice you are starting to feel like you don’t recognize yourself anymore, then you know you have a problem.
Sometimes this can happen very slowly over time, the more you make compromises on your goals and values, the further you go away from your original state. You should be the one who controls your own path in life and you need to decide who you are at your core. If you allow yourself to blend into someone else, you may lose all your original values. You may think you’re okay with this in the short term, but one thing is for sure: you will never be truly happy living someone else’s life or living by the expectations of those around you.
Take the time to figure this piece out in truth. It will be well worth your time for your long-term happiness.
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Anokhi Blogs, Anokhi Media, Arguments, Bickering, Compromise, Compromises, Disagree, Emotionally, Factors, Futile, Intimacy, Marriage, Men, Phases, Relationships, Signs, Survive, Truthful, Unresolved, Wedding, Women
Yvonne Sinniah
Author
Yvonne Sinniah (@YvonneSinniah) is a Relations Advisor and inspirational speaker focusing on helping individuals achieve success in personal and professional environments. focusing on helping individuals achieve success in personal and professional environments. She is on a mission to meet a nee...
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