/ Disconnect to Self-Connect

by Anokhi Admin

Disconnect to Self-Connect

Apr 04, 2014

With all of our gadgets at hand, have we lost our ability to be alone?

When I purchased my first BlackBerry I was so excited; BBM, texting, downloading apps and push email. I loved the sound of the ping! Being bombarded with alerts and notifications was exhilarating. Until one day, it started to drive me crazy and I had to turn it off.

This has probably happened to a few of us — the novelty of our smartphone and tablets starts to wear off and we crave some quiet yet we “need” to stay connected.

A recent survey conducted by Google on mobile usage in Canada, states that 79 per cent of Canadians would not leave home without their device, 78 per cent visit social networks and 52 per cent visit them at least once a day. In the United States, according to Lookout.com, 60 per cent of Americans said they don’t go an hour without checking their phone, while 54 per cent check their phones while lying in bed. Deloitte reports that, in the U.K., the number of smartphone users has jumped to 72 per cent — a 14 per cent increase from 13 months prior. It’s amazing how something so small can control our lives. But at what expense are we falling prey to these devices?

“There is a general expectation which is tied to this 24/7 accessibility/connectivity phenomenon,” says health and wellness expert Dr. Susan Biali. “Our brains are being continually stimulated by both the visual stimulus of the bright screens and the psychological effect of the ‘hits’ we get from things like getting new emails or exploring the fun things we enjoy online. Rest and relaxation are not valued in our society like they once were, or should be.”

It can be such a challenge to unplug, we often allow technology to invade our personal days and family vacations. It’s simply embedded into our lives. Have we lost our ability to disconnect?

Tech Obsessed

“Yes,” Dr. Biali says. “Part of it is the psychological addiction we have to our devices [and] part of it is the pressure we feel to be plugged in, like everyone else, to keep up.” The younger generation has a new way of developing relationships, experiencing grief and celebrating achievements. The face-to-face interactions that once solidified a bond are becoming less of a necessity. In the workplace, technology has blurred the lines between work and personal life and the pressure to remain competitive keeps us plugged in.

“With the ability to connect and be reached 24/7 it’s very challenging for virtually anyone to keep healthy boundaries between work and personal life,” Dr. Biali explains. “There is such pressure to stay competitive, yet being ‘slaves’ to our technology doesn’t give us the necessary screen-free space and time we need for optimal creativity and productivity.”

It’s About Balance

To seek peace of mind, one needs to be able to unplug and step outside of themselves in order to re-evaluate their place in life. “The very best solitude is not to be found in a connected life,” Dr. Biali says. “We don’t know yet what the long-term effects are of all this connectivity; it hasn’t been around long enough. But most certainly there will be long-term effects on our brains.”

Seeking solitude is seen as being selfish and unproductive. Dr. Biali says some studies indicate an increase in depression, isolation and anxiety, the more time is spent online. Although these studies are considered to be in the preliminary stages, here are some things we can do to minimize technology’s side effects.

Less is More

“It becomes like a compulsive habit that’s hard to break,” explains Dr. Biali. “So many people automatically reach for their phones and check email or Facebook any time they have a spare moment.” We all need our daily fix of social media but knowing when to pull away will assist in lessening our need to fill the gap in the free time we are allotted. “Some of us feel the pressure professionally as the market judges us more by our social media footprint,” Dr. Biali adds. “For other people, the number of followers, likes or comments you receive is a marker of social status.” We need to take the time to indulge with family, friends or just ourselves.

Reality Check

Living online can, at times, take away our sense of reality. Maintaining a sense of self will keep us connected to the now and keep us present in the moment. “The excessive focus on the average person’s personal life [on] this very public system of acknowledgement isn’t healthy and does create a narcissistic focus as a way of life,” explains Dr. Biali. “It’s hard to say if it actually changes the way people act toward others in real life (true narcissism is a very damaging phenomenon) but time will tell.”

Press Reset

Disconnecting from our connected life makes us more productive and setting aside time each day to recharge does good to us and everyone around us. So we need to hit reset and take control of our habits. “Like anything addictive, you’ve lost control when the technology controls you,” Dr. Biali explains. “You can’t decrease your time on it even though you really want to and know you should.”

_{BY TESSA JOHNSON

PUBLISHED IN THE BEAUTY ISSUE, SPRING/APRIL 2014}