Issue 34 / The Love Languages You Need To Know Now!

by Yvonne Sinniah

The Love Languages You Need To Know Now!

Jan 27, 2016

Do you feel that your love is totally lost in translation? We break down the key languages when talking love with your love!

Dr. Gary Chapman outlines five key love languages that you need to know now. With some awareness of your primary love language you are in a better position to build stronger relationships with your significant other or any loved ones in your life.

Something I have come to learn over the years is that the way I feel loved is certainly different from the way others feel loved. This came with some hard knocks learning about life and relationships but also with some observation and learning about how us humans give, receive, process, accept and feel loved.

In the South Asian culture, many of us have observed love being shown between our mothers and fathers and the general trend is seeing women show love through serving their husbands and men ensuring they provide for their wives. As an observer, learner and teacher of healthy relationships, these traditional acts of love do not always ensure that both parties feel loved. This becomes more apparent when we witness resentment and sadness by one or both parties towards each other.

The book that opened my eyes, and certainly is a mover and shaker for those learning more about how to give and receive love, is The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts by Dr. Gary Chapman. In this book, Dr. Chapman’s revelations and practical examples really explain how you can maximize the love you and your partner feel for each other and be more aware and minimize any gaps that occur between couples due to feeling unloved.

^{Photo Credit: www.5lovelanguages.com}

There are five ways that a person feels loved and knowing your primary love language and your partner’s primary love language can save you so much pain and heartache, allowing you to spend your energy and time on joyful moments with your significant other. So what are the Five Love Languages? Here they are:

Words of Affirmation

“This language uses words to affirm people.”

If this is your love language, you have a need to feel appreciated and loved through compliments, encouraging words and verbal expressions of love. You also tend to appreciate the extrovert who has no reservations expressing feelings of love for you. Remember if this is your primary love language, like the others that are explained below, you will also primarily show love this way as well. Take heed to the fact that the way you primarily express love may not be how your partner feels loved.

Acts of Service

“For these people, actions speak louder than words.”

This can be shown in multiple ways and if this is your primarily love language, you feel truly loved when you are relieved of tasks so you get to relax and do more of what you want in life. When your partner initiates acts of service, like watching the kids, cooking or taking something off your list of to-dos, if you find that your heart is just racing with joy then this is your love language.

Physical Touch

“For this person, nothing speaks more deeply than appropriate touch.”

^{Go ahead. Hug it out.

Photo Credit: www.dimitri.co.uk}

This is not a love language that is primarily about sex. Something as simple as a warm hug, a kiss and/or touch can make you feel very loved. Have you ever seen older couples that still show each other tender physical affection? Isn’t it a beautiful thing? Ah, such a wonderful love language. If this is your primary love language, take note and encourage your partner in these areas. Also if this is lacking in your relationship, rather than harboring resentment, be the one to initiate physical affection to bring you and your partner close to each other.

Quality Time

“This language is all about giving the other person your undivided attention.”

^{Those long walks can be worth their weight in gold.

Photo Credit: www.saidonline.com}

It is about being present and fully engaged in the moment. This means sharing meaningful moments in life together. It means putting your phone down and looking into each other’s eyes. Time is the commodity of love here and every moment spent together is how you feel most loved. If this is your primary love language or that of your partner's, it is important to schedule date nights and vacations to ensure quality time is part of the regular pattern of your lives together.

Gifts

“This love language is when one feels most loved and appreciated when receiving a gift.”

The gifts do not have to be expensive as the giving or receiving of the gift indicates that the other cares and loves you. It is symbolic of the love you both share. If this is your primary love language, start paying attention to how you show love as well so you realize that others may feel most loved in other ways and you don’t need to break your bank account to connect with your partner.

These Love Languages are worth exploring whether you are single or in a relationship. So as you venture into February, the month of love, learn your love language and explore the love languages of others. Start by taking your own love language test: Click here

Main Image Photo Credit: www.1.bp.blogspot.com

Yvonne Sinniah

Author

Yvonne Sinniah (@YvonneSinniah) is a Relations Advisor and inspirational speaker focusing on helping individuals achieve success in personal and professional environments. focusing on helping individuals achieve success in personal and professional environments. She is on a mission to meet a nee...